Things that no one can teach you in life

You often get to hear "..learn from the people around you, be open to what they can teach you..", still there are so many things that no one teaches you or can teach you. I can give you many instances.

Were those moral value classes in your school able to teach you how to be good as a human? Were your parents able to bring that motivation inside you to do something that you never wanted?

Have anyone of your friends taught you how to flirt or how to be the king of romance just like SRK? Surely no one could!

Have you been taught the art of communication? You may have mastered communication in your high school or college but when it comes to propose a girl, you still get afraid with the idea of being slapped in return.

Have they taught you how to judge people correctly? A 'somebody' in your life may prove to be a 'nobody' at the time of need. So you yourself learn to identify the traits of people around you.

These were some basic things which I pointed. Yet as we grow up to be an adult we learn many things by ourselves along the way that no school, or university, or parent can teach us. These lessons aren't the part of any class curriculum. They are taught between the lines, picked up through pain and faulty actions. Here are some lessons that only life can teach you by marching into it.

1. Who you are

Yes it has to be the first because it permeates every aspect of life. It takes the entire life span for the people to figure out who they actually are as a person or what they want from life. Everyone holds a different perception about you. Though no one can know you better than you. Just like our life, which never remains constant, so is our nature. With every step that we take in life, we meet with a new version of ourselves. Who you are is unique to you and to others, everytime. 

2. What's good for you

You can't leave on anyone to decide it for you. You have to choose what makes you happy. The best thing that you can do in life is follow your intuition. Take risks. Don't go for safe and easy choices just because you are afraid of what they might say. No one can choose where your happiness lies or what's good for you. You can't always be agreeable, that's how people take advantage of you.

3. What to dream

Your dream defines you. Follow your passion, follow your heart regardless of what others tell you to do. One of the greatest freedoms one can have is to peruse their dreams not caring about what everyone else thinks. After all at the end of the day it's you who has to live with your dream, not them. If you dare to dream, dare to have faith that things will fall at its right place, may be not in the way how you planned, but just how it meant to be.

4. How to get over those heartbreaks

When it comes to heartbreak, our parents and friends ideology doesn't help our awkward dating issues. Nevertheless, we can learn and grow from our experiences, for we alone have to come out of that bad phase of our life. No guidance from our peers can lessen the pain. However some of them could help avoid common mistakes that are bound to occur in dating and relationships.

5. How to think wisely

Thinking is an art. We need to be equipped with the ability to think wisely through scenarios and situations which inevitably arise in our lives. No parent or teacher teach how to think; even in maths, formulas are memorised. No basic understanding of formula's formation or what it is solving for or what are the real scenarios it's applicable to, are given to the students. Too often students are taught to follow the masses or follow the idea, that is already prevailing.

6. How to handle life's mess 

At some point in life everyone finds themselves in a sorry plight. And this is the harsh reality that no family or love can fix the problems. You can only get console but you have to pass through those streets alone. No one will walk in favour of you. You alone have to cope up with the ups and downs life brings. Everything eventually finds peace.

7. How to control our emotions

Emotions are the most beautiful element of our being which can solely set us apart from others. It takes a lot of patience to master our emotions. Actions taken under extreme emotions are bound to work against us. You learn to control it by yourself. No teacher teaches you. 

Everyone learns such lessons through their individual experiences. Certain lessons life teaches us, we gain wisdom through our experiences and how we evolve out of situations. Think about all the things you would love to tell yourself if you could travel back in time to give your younger self some advice about life. What has life taught you so far? Share your experiences! 

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Why do we feel lonely?

Karma and Destiny

Have you ever wondered what's the difference between karma and destiny? What is it that pulls the strings of our life? God does not write our fate, then who? The answer is 'you'. Believe it or not only you govern your life's events. It's your karma, your destiny that you created.

What is Karma?

Karma and destiny are two related words of which everyone have their own explanations. 

The theory of karma existed in India before the advent of Buddha, but it was Buddha who explained this doctrine in its true sense.

According to Buddhism Karma is intention, a willful action. One does karma by way of body, speech and intellect. The Buddha tried to redefine karma by emphasizing on 'intentions behind the action' pointing on a deeper truth. It is the will of spirit in action.

How Destiny means different from it? 

Let's take an example to define them more clearly. There is a popular saying "You reap what you sow". Here seed is destiny which offers opportunities in life. The kind of seed we want to sow is our choice. If I sow a rose seed, that is my path, my destiny, I choose which will only give me rose flower and not lotus flower. Now after that seed is sown, it asks for my maintenance. I look after it well and give it my care. That is my karma, sowing it in the right soil and watering it properly. This way I created my destiny by my karma.

This is called the law of cause and effect which has no beginning, no end. Destiny merely is not related to body, but the soul. Everyone is bound by the destiny which he carries in his palms even after reincarnation. We are responsible for our own growth. We are responsible for our own success and failure; happiness and misrey. We create our own heaven. We create our own hell. We are the architects of our fate.

If I sum up the whole thing, we can say karma governs destiny.. destiny governs karma. Our souls move in a never ending cycle of birth and rebirth to which we name reincarnation. We don't have much control over our destiny but karma can be changed. Karma is the result of our free will, our actions. We are solely responsible for everything that happen to us. 

Why do we feel lonely?

From the past few months I've been in a situation many a times where I feel so lonely and separated, a feeling that is absolutely hollow and the root cause of which is still mystery.

Yesterday I had a conversation with a friend and I realized that everyone feels lonely. It is something deep inside that is very natural. We all look for someone to be there, who do nothing, just be there.

There is a slight difference between being lonely and being alone. A person sitting in a room full of people may still feel lonely who doesn't have any listener; on the other hand a person sitting alone may not feel lonely due to the self love or be it the faith he has on God or be it the moral support from someone or anything. 

Even after having everything, people feel a little alone

• some in terms of moral support;

• some in terms of a friend;

• some in terms of a partner;

• some in terms of a listener.

What we all seek is a support, a faith from someone that will never slip away.. someone to comfort us.. someone to make us feel secure.. someone with whom we can share our life! 

My friend regarded them as "different versions of God" to overcome loneliness, some people say them soulmates, some say them bff or even some people show their religious beliefs in gem stones; a thing be it living or non living that strengthen their faith. It is that belief only (of which the reason may be anything) which helps us in overcoming this loneliness. And that internal peace enables positivity of our minds which further brings positivity in our lives. One belief does it all. 

Why do you feel lonely? What do you do to overcome this loneliness? What is that moral support for you? Share your thoughts below. :)

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What if you weren't afraid?

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What if you weren't afraid?

Take a few minutes out of your busy lives and think about it. If you had nothing to fear or nothing holding you back, what would you do? What is your dream that you've been keeping inside the deep cores of your heart?

If you weren't afraid, would you take a flight to never come back? Would you escape and sail around the world? Would you take up a career that you love? Would you be a writer for a change to write an epic love story for yourself? 

We're afraid of everything in life and our fears hold us back from living an epic life we could live doing the things that we only dream of and at the same time be scared of.

• Perhaps we would speak up more honestly, if we weren't afraid of being judged;
• Perhaps we would follow our hearts, if we weren't afraid of the society;
• Perhaps we would take every sort of risk, if we weren't afraid of failure;
• Perhaps we would reach heights, if we weren't afraid of falling down. 

We're more concerned about the question 'what people will say?'. I'm not regarding fear as any external enemy created by the society. Rather it is an internal factor which lies within us and that restraints us from being who we actually are: fear of being judged, fear of being different, fear of looking silly, fear of failure, or even fear of death! 

These are the big roadblocks that creates hurdles on every step!

What would you do if you weren't afraid of anything? Think over it and share your views below on the comments section! :)

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It's all about you 

Have you ever felt like being so messed up in life that nothing seems to go at its right place. Negativity surrounds you from all possible directions, leaving no escape. Your actions are considered as your sin, and your good deeds are of no value. People have endless stuff to discuss upon behind your back, you don't even have an idea about which.

You probably must have. At least once in life.

It happens like this only, you know! Hundreds of mouths will continue to depress you. They'll have a never ending opinion of you. The more you'll give the less they'll feel. But comforting others doesn't always ask you to lose yourself. There comes a time when you need to prioritize yourself. You need to define the limits of your relation with yourself and with others. After crossing that limit, you cannot please others, just to save your relation with them. You are not left with any choice. You need to take stand for your self esteem and no one else will.

And remember you do nothing wrong if you start thinking for yourself first!

Isn't it funny how people change? Actually it's not the people who change, time does. Time has a great way to show what matters for them, for you, for me. It's the mask that falls off the faces and a true picture is shown. But one thing I would say to remember, never let anyone be the reason who you are today. Change for yourself, not for them. Change for your betterment, not for theirs. After all, it's all about you, only you can make difference.

Keep shining, keep smiling and love yourself! :)
                                             
                                           -Mahima Goel